professional development haiku

My Bitter Half was forced to endure an inane presentation from a representative from Reading First, a federally sponsored program of questionable merit that is the bane of specials teachers everywhere. The rep kept referring to something he called, "Nickelby". About twenty minutes into it, after some confusion, they figured out this guy was talking about No Child Left Behind--NCLB.

Anyway, it was predictably dull to hear this guy pimp an irksome program that was already in place, so a couple of the teachers started passing notes. (This is a common coping tactic. Don't pretend you've not done it.) They started writing Professional Development Plan haikus to avoid brain atrophy. Here's a sampler's worth:

The MAN in our school
Our kids have flunked Reading First
Don't you want the grant?
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This one's from a diabetic---nearly lost his leg--who's being moved up to the new middle school.

I'm still a biped
But I'm losing my classroom
Middle School next year.
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A reflection from earlier in the year:

Shards of glass outside
Kids' shoes off on the playground
Imminent nurse help!
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The principal says she wants this one tattooed on her arm:

Principal stretched thin
Mother, queen, and referee
Whip them all soundly.
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There are plenty more. I'll post them as my man remembers them.